An Anguished Abby

(I've decided to write this one in third person for a little change of pace)
Today things began to look a little grim for the ol Loomball. This past Monday she had the opportunity to talk with Margaret, her future TEFL teacher. Good news: Margaret, a vibrant redheaded American with a variety of colorful skirts, seemed both totally nice and totally with-it. The bad news? Margaret told ol Luminosity that the TEFL class was going to be intense: in class from 9-5 everyday (part of the time practice-teaching) with up to four hours of homework! Also, there would be only one other classmate to share the burden (a woman, Margaret didn't know her age, married... and everyone knows that married people are boring*). The Loominostrich's joy at nearing the finish line of her occasionally tedious Spanish class disappeared faster than the last jug of wine at an asado. All of a sudden, trying to decipher Antonio Banderas' speed-of-light Spanish accent for four hours a day didn't seem so bad.
Little did Loopy Loomis know that things would only get more drastic. When she awoke in a pool of lovely Santiago sunlight this Thursday morning, she had one thing on her mind: what the hijo de puta huevon pelotudo indudable concha de tu madre was she going to do after the 21st of December? She had a bus ticket to Mendoza and a couple of friends who had said they could host her. Months ago. But after that? Panicked, she ran to dear ol Margaret. The Loominator poured out her fears and this is what Margaret said: "Oh Abstrocity. Here's what you need to do. Get your certificate to teach English. Once you get to Mendoza, hit the streets looking for jobs. Email the people in Buenos Aires and check out some schools in Santiago if you have time. You probably won't get a job, or at least more than a few classes, because it's the summer and the season really doesn't start until February. Other than that, be practical, don't spend a lot of money, cook for yourself (!), don't go out very much (!!) and mooch off your Argentine friends as long as possible."
Abacus held her head in her hands and began to softly weep. What kind of a plan was this? What if her money ran out before she got a job? What if her Argentine friends didn't mean it literally when they said "you can stay as long as you want"? Margaret gave her a pat on the shoulder. "Most importantly," she said, "don't stress out." Clearly, Margaret did not know who she was dealing with.
But don't worry dear readers. There was a light at the end of the tunnel for our friend AbFlex. It came in the form of a miraculously successful phone call to her friend Flor, in Argentina. "Oh amiga!" said Flor, "you just HAVE to spend Christmas with me and my family! Besides, everyone knows that the food/people/clothes/nightlife/air/Spanish/music/wine/plant species in Argentina are far superior to that of Chile!" Upon hanging up the phone, she felt a little less Loomiserable. Maybe she still had no idea what to anticipate in the year 2008. But she had a to-do list, and plans for Christmas. For now, that would do.
*only kind of true.